I Have a New Partner, Should I Use My Old Sex Toys?

While you might look forward to throwing your ex-partner’s favorite shirt in the trash, you may not be as excited at the though of ditching those expensive sex toys. Following a breakup, many men and women continue to use their sex toys for personal stimulation, but feel uncomfortable about making them part of a new sexual relationship.

There is no need to shy away from your sex toys simply because you’ve changed partners. However, even if you clean your toys regularly, an extra-special scrub will help to put your mind at ease. Be sure to follow the manufacturer’s recommended instructions whenever possible, since some toys should be kept away from water. Many sex shops offer antibacterial cleansers that are specifically intended for use with sex toys, to kill bacteria and prevent any materials from breaking down.

If your vibrator is made of silicone, it is usually safe to boil the toy for a few minutes. However, if the toy takes batteries or features any electrical components, it should never be submerged in water. If you have difficulty finding a cleanser or you’re unsure about the recommended care for a particular model, try searching online. Alternatively, old-fashioned soap and water is always an option, as long as you steer clear of parts that could be harmed if wet. After you’ve thoroughly cleaned your toys, you will likely feel much better about introducing them to a new partner.

Morally, there is nothing wrong with using the same sex toys from partner to partner, unless of course it bothers the other person. If your new partner has any issues with the toys – such as wondering where they came from, how old they are, and whether or not they were used with anyone else – these are concerns you will have to address. Do not force your partner to do something that they are not comfortable with, and be ready to abandon the topic (and the toys) if need be.

Don’t be discouraged if you have to slide the sex toy box back under the bed. Chances are, your partner finds the thought of you and another person having sex unsettling, not the toys themselves. Give the topic a rest and when you feel your partner is ready, ask about toys in general. To overcome the hurdle of the tainted toys, suggest that the two of you make a few purchases together as a way of starting a brand new collection.

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