My husband calls me names in front of the children If you are in a abusive relationship, it can be hard to get over it, but it can also be easy to recover from as well. Having a verbal abuser come at you everyday is something that is very hard to deal with, but you don't have to, and the faster you confront the issue, the easier it will be to make your decision to stay around, or to leave your abuser. Self-esteem is the biggest issue when dealing with a verbal abuser. A lot of times verbal abuse happens when the abuser feels that your self-esteem is low, and they can take advantage. If you increase your self-esteem level, it will lower your risk of becoming verbally abused by your husband. In many situations, the person who's being verbally abused may not even recognize that they are being abused. They might think that is how that person is, and it is something you just have to deal with. You might even think that the verbal abuse is your fault, and you may even take up for your abuser, by putting the blame on yourself. In most cases the abuser believes that his actions are validated. Most abusers can't and won't recognize their own self-worthlessness, so they continue to feed off of someone else's low self-esteem. The abused, more than likely, will feel that it is their fault and they deserved to be verbally abused, in hopes that one day, their abuser will change. Most of the time, the abuser's own life may be so screwed up, that the only way to deal with their emotions is to take it out on others. The abuser's words will often reflect what they feel inside. If you are being verbally abused, don't feel like your alone. Even the strongest people can be broken down when it comes to verbal abuse. As human beings, we all have our weaknesses, and if someone really wants to hurt us verbally, it can be done. When someone knows your weaknesses, it is easy for them to expose them, and make you feel less important. When dealing with an abusive husband, the most important question is, are you willing to stay with your abuser if he doesn't stop? You should try a marriage counselor and try to get professional help. But if that doesn't work, then you really need to think about the consequences of staying in an abusive marriage. You may want to seek out friends who have possibly gone through the same thing for support. If you have a religious background, then you should find a church, or go to your current church, and seek advice from your pastor, preacher, priest, etc. Another way to deal with an abusive situation is finding a comfortable place where you can think about all your options. Spend time at places that have made you happy, that will let you know that just being yourself will make you happy, and that you don't have to be with your abuser to be happy. Remember, it's your choice if you want to be in an abusive relationship. You have many options to choose from. Seeking help from friends, church, and marriage counselors are all different ways of trying to correct the situation, but it' up to you to make the decision to stay or leave.
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