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Things Not To Say To:

Divorced Man
Divorced Woman
Expectant Mom
Grandchild That Has Lost A Grandparent
Newly Grandmother
Parents That Have Lost A Child
Someone Who Is Depressed
Stepfather and Stepchild
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Things Not To Say To Parents That Have Lost A Young Child

Losing a child at birth or at any other time is one of the most devastating feelings a family will endure. Well wishers may say things that are inappropriate at the time, but with good intentions.

Below is a list of comments that should not be said to any parent that has lost a child.

  • "It might have been for the better, with all his complications."
  • "I feel your pain, but he is in a better place."
  • "He would have taken up a lot of your time had he survived."
  • "You can always have more children."
  • "Consider yourselves blessed that he did not have to have all those operations."
  • "He would have been deformed, if he would have made it."
  • "Children are so demanding. Now you can continue your education."
  • "I didn't want to watch you suffer with his illness."
  • "You did the best that you could."
  • "You made the right decision to let him go. He would have been a burden on the both of you."
  • "It is never easy to bury a child, but I see no reason why you are keeping him alive."
  • "Your other children need you now. Stop grieving for him."
  • "It would be cheaper to cremate him, since you really did not get to know him."
  • "I've seen other parents get through the loss of their child a lot sooner than you."
  • "I can't give you the sympathy you need. I am grieving myself."
  • "Are you going to seek counseling? It seems to be taking a toll on you."
  • "Why do you insist on keeping all his belongings? They're only reminders of him."

Grieving is something that can only be expressed and felt by the person feeling it. Give each parent his own time and space to grieve. You may mean well, but some things are better left unsaid.

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