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Dealing with the Parents of the Younger Man

If an older woman dates a younger man then when it comes to his parents she may have more to deal with than she bargains for. The age difference that exists between the two people could play a big role and the larger the age difference is, the more upset his parents might be.

Although it is becoming more socially acceptable for older women to date younger men, not everyone is always willing to accept it. This is especially the case if it is your son who is dating an older woman. An age difference of three or four years is one thing but some parents cringe at the thought of their son dating a woman 10 to 15 years his senior. It is understandable why the parents would be concerned despite the fact that it is their son’s own life and he must make his own decisions.

In Western cultures it is a trend that is being more readily embraced than in other cultures, such as for example, the Asian culture. With many old world values, most Asian parents frown down on their son dating an older woman. If the age difference is minimal then that is one thing but a big age gap that is into the double digits is even more cause for concern. Parents worry that their son is dating a woman who will not be able to bear him children or a woman who has a lot of baggage from her past, or that she is too experienced or sophisticated for him, among other worries. This problem is even more worrisome for a parent if the son is in his twenties and just embarking on his adult life and the woman is well into her thirties or forties. Some parents assume that it is just a phase or a learning curve that their son is going through while others may worry that it could develop into a more serious relationship.

It is important for the younger man to communicate to the older woman he is dating about the reservations his parents have about their relationship before the woman meets the man’s parents for the first time. Knowing what to expect is half the battle and everyone likes to be prepared. Upon meeting the parents treat them with respect and politeness and be honest with them when they ask questions. Some parents will automatically be more reserved than others. Be aware as well that sometimes both parents will not agree on this issue. The father may be okay with the situation while the mother is not or vice versa.

Keep in mind that you may not become very close to his parents or on the other hand you might find that you do and that you enjoy their company quite a bit. His parents might relax considerably once they meet you and see what kind of a person you are. Once they see that you genuinely care for their son this should take some of the emphasis off of the age difference. Be aware that if you keep calling attention to the age disparity then other people will at well.

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