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Suppressing my appetite

It's not that I'm just completely obsessed with my weight, but more like I've somehow managed to suppress my appetite and hunger, for whatever reason.

I'm always exhausted. I sleep off my hunger, and at the end of the day, I calculate all of the things I've eaten to make sure that I've eaten something.

This has been going on for the past two, maybe three, months. But my concerns about my weight began when I first went off to college.

At my university, the average freshman gains 22 lbs. However, I'm a broadcast major and I can't afford to gain anything, even though I'm only 5'1 and 103 lbs. I guess I'm right were I'm supposed to be.

My sister was a really nice size when she went off to school, and she gained about 25 lbs. her freshman year. I saw how differently people treated her when she came back and I vowed that it would never happen to me.

But I didn't just stop eating because I was afraid of gaining weight. I broke up with my first love and I believe that's when I went into a depression over it for a couple of months.

Now, I just try to eat something. Anything. But it's such a struggle because when I do get the urge to eat, by the time the food is in front of me, my appetite is immediately lost. This happens a lot at restaurants.

I've come to the conclusion that large amounts of food intimidates me. Now I eat smaller portions and just try to take it slow.

I know that I will be back to normal soon. If there is hope for me, I know there is hope for you.

 

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