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I wish I could stop

I was just browsing through and came across this site, and thought I'd just share my story and see if anyone could give me any good advice.

I never really worried about my weight until I was 11, a couple of months before my 12th birthday. It all started when I was sitting at the table having a family meal and my step dad said I shouldn't keep eating so much and that I was getting fat.

I went upstairs to my room and looked in the mirror. And for the first time in my life I realized how fat I was (of course I wasn't, I might have been a bit chubby but not fat! but I thought I was.) and then I remembered a book I had read (girls under pressure by Jacqueline Wilson) and how she had made herself sick! So I ran into the bathroom and locked the door.

At first I couldn't do it by sticking my fingers down my throat so I tried using a tooth brush instead and it worked! And that's how it started.

I would wait all day till dinner to eat and then I would go throw up. I did this for about about a month but then I stopped because my mum started to notice that I was loosing weight.

I am now 15 and have been doing it on and off for the past 3 years. I started doing it again, but this time it's a lot worse! I have been doing it constantly for 4 months now.

I'm 4'11 and weigh 5 st 4lbs and have lost 25 lbs (nearly 2st). I have been thinking about getting help, but I feel to ashamed and embarrassed.

My friends and family have noticed that I've lost a lot of weight but I wear baggy cloths so they don't notice just how much. I was wandering if there was anyway of getting help without my friends and family finding out?

I would really like some advice on how I can stop doing what I do and maybe talk with someone who has gone through what I've been going through. If so, send me an email at jess-kitty@hotmail.co.uk

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