Quitting Cold Turkey

I just want to tell my story of quitting cold turkey with NO help from anyone else.

About 10 months ago, I decided that my life was more important to me than my habit. I was in my car on my way home from work when a country song came on..."holes in the floor of heaven" and it spoke of death. It was a beautiful song and it really hit home to me.

I was about to get married in a few months to a wonderful man and the thought of dying young, due to lung cancer, gave me the worst feeling. I cried out to God, while driving. I told him I couldn't do it on my own and I needed his help. Tears streaming and the song playing. I threw out my cigarette. I was smoking and when I got home, I took my pack and broke them up and threw them away.

Sure, I had tried to quit before and hadn't been successful for very long. I had been a smoker for about 8 years or so, which isn't as long as a lot of people, but still long enough to have me "hooked". How was I going to be able to not reach for one after eating, when driving, after sex, and when I was bored.

The thoughts were running wild in my head and I cried and cried tears of joy. I was going to do it this time and for sorrow that I wouldn't have that wonderful feeling of a cigarette in my hands.

I knew this time would be different. Don't ask me how I knew, but I think it was truly my willpower and faith in God. The first couple weeks were hard. The next couple months were the hardest.

My brother tried to commit suicide. He checked himself in a hospital (we didn't know where he was for a week) and was diagnosed Schizophrenic. He had to move home with my mom. It was very rough, the things we found out about his life was so different than "normal" people. It was devastating. My first reaction was to pick up a cigarette and start smoking and dragging it down my lungs.

Did I do it? NOPE! Honestly, I am not real sure how I made it through those 10 months. When about 6 of those months were very trying. I had some very stressful test that God gave me...my brother's problem, my Granny dying, my mom had a cancer scare, my own IBS diagnosis ...etc. Everything you can imagine to test me was done and I passed.

Oh, on top of it all: MY HUSBAND STILL SMOKES!

I had to quit, COLD TURKEY, with all those stresses and still have the person I live with smoke around me!

By the grace of God and my will power and strong desire to live a long healthy life, I have made it this far. I know it will be a struggle every day of my life, but it has gotten easier, a lot easier. Not to mention all the money I have saved!

I just wanted to share my story....my joy ...thank you.

Nell

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