I need help
Woke up this morning telling myself, "girl you need help you can’t do it on your own.." so the first step is sharing my story.
I’am not sure when it all started and I don’t know exactly if it is bulimia or not, but it’s definitely something.
When I was 16 I started not eating to lose a lot of weight. I managed to pull myself up after telling myself to stop and I did.
Everything was ok for a while but then I started to eat a lot of food in a short period of time. I wouldn’t vomit or take laxatives or anything but the next day I would hardly eat anything, and I would promise myself I would stop but I didn’t. For 3 years I would do the same thing every 4 to 6 days.
I was feeling horrible about myself. I didn’t really put on so much weight but the guilt I felt always made me feel bad. I got into a vicious circle and I couldn’t stop until I started having problems with my period. I got scared so I stopped.
I ate normal for one or two years and I was happy. I was healthy, but I still had problems with my period. Two weeks ago I had my period! I was so happy! I was on the right track! But I don’t know what happened after that. I started eating like crazy again. I have been eating like crazy every 3 to 4 days. Every morning I tell myself I will stop and start over but I realized this morning I cant!
What should I do? You see I don’t hate my body I actually really love the way I look but I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I don’t throw up after eating or take anything to eliminate the food. I'm scared I won’t stop. I want to get help, but I have no money for a therapist and I don’t know where to look.
Is it bulimia at the beginning stages?
Anyone write at firstname.lastname@example.org
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