Bulimic and Anorexic, understanding why I became bulimic, my life as a bulimic and anorexic

MY LIFE AS A BULIMIC AND ANOREXIC!

I was always a happy kid with not a care in the world. That is until just before my 12th birthday, then my whole life turned upside down

I had never really liked my weight, but I never really thought I was fat. I knew I was a bit on the chubby side and it didn't really bother me.

It was a couple of months before by 12th birthday and me and my family had been sitting down drinking ice tea. My mum said something about me eating too much and if I didn't stop I was going to get really fat!!

That completely terrified me. I decided to go on a diet. I had read somewhere about this girl who had stopped eating and had lost
tons of weight, so I thought it would be a great idea if I also stopped eating.

I didn't stop eating all together. I skipped breakfast and lunch and would eat a tiny dinner. My mum noticed this, so she thought it would be a good idea to try and scare me into thinking I would gain weight by doing this. She said by doing this I would end up putting on weight not losing it, because I would be getting double the calories if I did not eat all day.

I then turned to bulimia. I would carry on eating nothing all day until tea time, then I would go throw it all up.

My mum took me to see a doctor and they told her it was a phase and nothing to worry about. I wasn't underweight.

No one knows to this day that I was bulimic including my parents. They still think it was all a phase.

I am now 5"0 and weigh 79lbs, and because I've always been slim due to starvation diets, etc. No one really notices if I lose weight because they tend to think I'm just naturally slim. I also tend to cover up in clothes that hide my body.

I have never tried to get help, even though deep down I know I should. I just don't know how.

Thanks to who ever takes the time too read this, although its probably not one you would wish to read, seeing as I'm still the same, but I wish everyone who has these life threatening disorders the best of luck!!

x jess x

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