Athletic sports and my eating disorder

Hey, I know this looks like something huge and no one would want to read, but...you should.

I'm 14. I will be 15 in a couple of months yeah sure,...I'm pretty young, yet, I am still going through what many have already overcome.

I'm probably one of the most athletic people around. There isn't an intense sport that I don't play. And when you see me, you would never be able to guess the things I'm going through.

A major issue I was faced with was the fact that I would be playing hooker on my rugby team. Hookers are normally the smallest people on the team, but the other hookers were smaller than I was. It made me feel horrible, especially when we would get lifted. I was also very embarrassed changing in the change rooms in front of the other girls at sports such as hockey and soccer.

It started a little while ago. I told myself I needed to lose weight. At the time I was 118 lbs.

I did research on the disorder to learn about bulimia and anorexia. I read the stories of other teens and it was very interesting to see them going through the same thing I was.

I soon found out that purging and throwing up, does not work, so don't force your functioning body to so something like that. I have been through it. It will make your mouth very sore and it will ruin your body. Don't do it, it doesn't even work.

However starving yourself does ruin your body, but it is just as dangerous. Don't do it.

I went a whole day without taking anything in but some diet coke. I woke later that night at around 1 a.m. and I felt as if I was going to faint. I knew what the problem was so I stumbled down the stairs and ate something. I ate a cookie. I remember the feeling. It was scary.

After taking a bite, I just felt sicker so I threw it out. But I knew I had to eat something, so I got another and forced myself to eat it. Ten minutes later I felt perfectly fine, but I was shocked at what I went through.

I seriously thought I was going to fall over any minute. I was out of breath and that's really bad for me since I am so athletic. I know my limits. I know when enough is enough and that's why I forced myself to eat that cookie.

I believe if you know this then why not lower your diet down a little bit? LITTLE BIT just a bit okay?

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