Sexual Abuse

What Is Sexual Abuse?

Sexual abuse encompasses any form of degradation, manipulation, force or control of sex. For the abuser, sex is the way that he or she establishes power and dominance in the relationship. Many sex abusers see their partners as sex objects and they depersonalize their partners. Some sexual abusers can only become sexually excited when they use force, degradation or violence on their partners. Many sexual abusers are not faithful to their partners.

My personal story of sexual abuse

It is important to understand that sexual abuse in a domestic situation need not only imply a forced rape. Though forced rape is sexual abuse, sexual abuse can wear many faces.

• A victim of sexual abuse may find that his or her partner (abuser) is the decision maker in regards to their sexual encounters.
• A victim may be coerced or forced into having sex with an abuser whenever and however the abuser wants it.
• A victim may find that his or her partner (abuser) uses his or her bodily sensitivities and vulnerabilities against him or her.
• A victim may be made to feel that his or her discomfort is his or her problem and not a result of the partner’s actions.
• A victim may be forced to engage in sex acts with others.

Sexual abuse will sometimes go hand in hand with physical abuse. Sometimes sexual abuse may occur after a physical assault. Sometimes physical abuse occurs as a part of sexual abuse. Sexual abuse can also be purely emotional and psychological.

Many times a sexual abuser is very jealous. He or she may be extremely suspicious of what his or her partner does on a daily basis. A sexual abuser may accuse his or her partner of flirting or infidelity. Sexual abusers may also become jealous with any relationship his or her partner has, be it with a friend, co-worker, clergy or relative. They may also become jealous over someone their partner may have come in contact with only once, such as at a store, post office or at a social event. Sometimes the abuser will torment his or her partner with made up details of the partner’s infidelities.

If you are a victim of domestic violence, help is available. Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE. They will direct you to safe places in your area where you can seek help.

Domestic Abuse Support Groups

Sexual Addiction Support Groups

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